Dating app verification scam: a match sent a link to verify

How the trick works

The FBI described the pattern in an April 2024 public service announcement. A match seems keen, moves the chat off the dating app to a messaging app, and then says that for safety they only meet people who have been verified.

The link leads to a site that looks official, with fake news articles and warnings about predators. It asks for your name, phone, email and card number for a free check, then signs you up to costly monthly charges from a business you have never heard of. The FBI says the details can also be used for identity theft or sold.

This is not new. In 2022 BleepingComputer found more than six dozen such ID check sites pushed to Tinder and Grindr users, each asking for a card before showing anything, then billing a recurring subscription.

What the messages look like

A second version skips the website. The match says they will send you a code to prove you are real and asks you to read it back. That code usually unlocks an account in your name.

The FTC is plain about it: a verification code is only for you, and anyone who asks for it is a scammer. See the Google Voice code scam.

In India the request may be a small UPI payment to verify, or a link that asks for card details. Treat it the same way: a check a match sends you that costs money is not a safety check.

How to tell a real check from a fake one

Many apps run their own checks. Tinder, for example, verifies photos with a video selfie inside the app, and in 2024 announced ID checks for the US and UK, shown as badges on the profile.

If the link says it is from Realr

Realr is also a way to ask someone to prove who they are before you meet, so it is fair to ask how you would tell a real Realr request from a fake one.

• A Realr link is always on realr.me. Check the address in your browser's address bar, not the text in the message, before you type anything. A fake can be one letter off, so read it slowly.
• Asking someone to prove who they are on Realr is free, and so is answering. You will not be asked for card details to answer a check.
• Never read a code out to the person who sent you the link, whatever site it seems to come from.
• If anything feels off, don't follow the link. Open realr.me yourself and look the person up at realr.me/verify.

If it already happened

1. If you entered a card, call your bank or card issuer, dispute the charge and ask about cancelling the card.
2. Check your statements for small recurring charges from names you don't recognise.
3. If you sent a code, sign in to the account it belongs to, change the password and turn on two-step verification.
4. Report the profile inside the dating app, and stop replying.

• ReportFraud.ftc.govReport the scam to the Federal Trade Commission.
• IC3.govThe FBI’s internet crime complaint center, for losses online.
• IdentityTheft.govIf they got your ID, Social Security number or account details.

Questions